RE: Ascend Reviews!
06-05-2012 9:34 AM
Formula's working great as is. . . I wouldn't want you to change a thing. If you do change the blend could you offer the new version in addition to this existing formula please? It's so good as is. . . .
Wore 1 spray of Ascend Covered with two sprays Dirty English. All to the throat.
Went downtown to get some gas, buy groceries and deposit my paycheck. Didn't notice anything untill after my errands were over. . . So after I got my shit done I went and picked up my Dad with the new beamer, then went to my uncles house to hangout. My two cousins (ages 18 and 26) were there, along with my uncle who is 56 yo. Before we got there I sprayed a shot of Ascend on my pops. Before I could get my Dirty English out to cover it he says "MAN! It smells like someone just pissed on my neck!" So I quickly spray him with two shots of Dirty English right over the Ascend.
So the Old Man and I are hanging with my uncle, his son and his nephew. Didn't notice any respect or anything from them. My older cousin told me that "You're looking fit", and asked me if I would tutor him in math as well as teach him to eat and train properly. Not really a hit because I'm highly intelligent and physically gifted. (not to sound like a dick it's just a statement of fact to help convey the context of an interaction).
The hit came when a friend of my uncle's neighbor came over. My uncle's neighbor is an old biker chick, about 50, 1 outa 10 on looks Eek. Her friend was 41, and 7/10, lets call her "G". We had been all sitting in his living room for a while when they came over. So my uncle introduces us.
After a bit, my uncle starts flirting with G, and actually talked her out of her pants (LOL let me explain. She was joking about getting a job as a ring girl for the local MMA fights; he had her turn around so he could get a look at her, then negged her saying you gotta do a little working out girl. She replies with "it's the pants" and back and forth untill he gets her to drop her pants in a rather suggestive manner in front of us all.(the pant drop wiggle - you know what I'm talking about, where she wiggles her hips like a snake side to side as she lowers then pulls back up her pants)
I noticed that I was getting more than my fare share of eyecontact from G. I was getting about 50% of her attention while my uncle and father each got the other 25%. Also the conversation's subjects and content turned very very sexual after an hour or so. She started to run her fingers through her hair ALOT, flipping it, messing it up, pulling it off of her neck, etc. She primped her jacket twice. She also would cross and uncross her legs alot. Also, when she did cross her legs, she put her hand between her thighs, and eventually that hand would end up in her crotch. She would have her other hand holding the "lucky" hand's wrist while she did this. This went on for several hours and it was obvious she was turned on.
At one point she asked me how old I was. Then she acted like she wanted to hook me up with her niece who lives nearby.
G left for a cigg and when she returned the seating got shuffled around. G ended up next to me on the couch. She sat as far as possible from me on the edge of her seat. I could smell that she had just put on some perfume or bodyspray, a sweet fruity crisp scent lol. After a while she relaxed in her seat beside me; only enough for her leg to brush mine slightly. But she never scooted back into the seat of the couch like everyone else. Very tense body language which gradually went to a more relaxed state, but never one of comfort. She remained perched on the edge of her seat the entire time. Eventually she and the neighbor left.
Next day:
2 Sprays Ascend. One behind each ear Covered with Dirty English.
The reason I wore two sprays was today we had a new housekeeper. This is an old lady that I don't particularly care for who does flowerbeds and other landscaping. (She comes across as condescending, calls me "Kiddo" which grates on my nerves, and is simply an all around irritating person).
Okay maybe she has the right to call me "kiddo" because she is very "ripe" Sarcastic. 60? I don't know, anyways I didn't want her calling me Kiddo today so Two sprays it was. And. . .It worked, she didn't call me kiddo once today.
Nothing really play-by-play worthy. Simply put: I was told to call my own shots and work on my own today. I guess MILF had some confidence in me today LOL.
Ascend . . . kicks ass.
Oh yea, BTW my 18 year old cousin was totally incredulous. He could not believe what he just saw when the cougar dropped her drawers for the room full of men and one lady ROFL. . . The look on his face was priceless.
2 Sprays Ascend - one behind each ear covered with Aqua di Gio, ditto.
Well, today I was "called in" to pull a double by "new- MILF" hereby refereed to as "Hoe-Bag", and I guess to Hoe-bag on the other end it sounded like I didn't want to come in to pull said double. (which is bullshit - I told her I was available if she needed me but it was inconvenient at the time and not to call me in without cause). So she says oh I guess I don't need you. I ask if she's sure, and she says yes.
So then an hour later I get a phone call from MILF my manager saying, could you please come in, blah blah blah. Apparently Hoe-bag thought I wasn't willing to come in, and went behind my back to complain. LOL but me and MILF both know what's up right of the bat. Hoe-Bag is just a conniving passive aggressive whore . . . We got right to the root of the issue.
But now I'm pissed. This stupid bitch is trying to make me look bad. . . Which is ironic because she is actually the one not doing a good job. . . Hence me getting called in to cover her shit. . . Things any other housekeeper could handle. . . But not Hoe-Bag.. . She needs HELP. . .
I come in as requested with a spray of Ascend behind each ear. Hoe-bag starts off on a good complaino-train of thought, which I manage to dis-rail. I make my position clear, and the miss communication quickly becomes clear to hoe-bag. Hoe-bag is pretty stubborn too, I think Ascend helped in this regard.
Then later in the day Hoe-Bag actually started to apologize for calling me in, for making me pull a double, etc. The Ascend flip-flop strikes again! No Matter What I'm Right! haha!
Then it gets better. So I'm done with my housekeeping, now I get to wait some tables in the restaurant like I was supposed to be doing. About midway through the shift a group of three people a bit older than me comes in and sits at the bar. A dude about 32-35, a cute girl about 28-33 yo, and a meh chick of the same age. They order double margaritas, and have some foodz. . . Since I'm waiting on them I naturally shoot the bull with them a bit. Turns out they're in a band, so we talk about our common interest of music.
Cutie was wearing a pink and white pro-fitted cap pimped off to the side with skin tight jeans, punk white and black top and a jean jacket. LOL details details.
The hit came as they were leaving. Cutie was up and about walking around while the dude (who was apparently her boyfriend lol) was in the john. I had just loaded up a tray clearing one of my tables when cutie pounced on me. (haha while the BF was in the shitter). As I was walking past her with a fully loaded tray she stopped me and asked my name. I answered her, and she told me hers in turn. . . Which I might add was an appropriately sexy name for such a hottie. (Also note that typically people will leave me alone and/or get out of my way when I come walking by with a loaded tray). She offered her hand but I showed her mine (complete with ketchup!) and we end up bumping elbows and laughing. She told me that she's going to be house sitting around here, inquired what nights I was working; and when she could see me. She winked at me as she left too. HIT! Lol. BF came out of the shitter and the group left, but my grin didn't
I hadn't really intended to wear 2 sprays of Ascend to one of my server shifts, EVER. . . But it worked out fine, everyone tipped extremely well . . . Maybe I should wear Ascend as a server more often LOL.
Oh! I forgot a hit!
So as I got started serving the AM waitress was finishing her sidework. I am standing right beside her in the narrow walk way. She eye rapes me and says "Nice guns" then runs her hand down my arm. HIT!
Then about a half hour later we're sitting side by side at the bar making silverware roll-ups. She runs out of napkins, and reaches over me to grab some from my stack. I say "OY! Those are MY napkins girl". So sh gives me a big hug, practically draping herself across my shoulders and says here's your payment.
God about 10 different sexual comments ran through my mind after that, she practically set them up for me. But I didn't say any of them, not appropriate at work. But man I had some flirty comebacks to "here's your payment", hahaha.
1 spray of Ascend - throat. Covered with Black Spice.
At work (cook today)
Haven't been reporting on anything because I haven't been wearing any 'mones for the last few days.
Today went smooth. If there was a self effect, it was a positive uplifting "good mood". The respect and deference was subtle today. I was backup cook. with my buddy J as the lead cook. Only one hit from him. He made some gravy and somehow I took control of it and finished spicing it. (you had to be there - it was very strange. It was like when I tasted his gravy it became MY gravy. He deferred to me)
I saw the hot band chick again today. I was at the bar after my shift. (ascend applied at 8AM, sitting at bar at 2:30 PM. 6+ hours) she came in for a cuppa coffee. As she comes in the door we make eye contact immediately. We smile and wave, and she comes over to stand next to me (I took the end barstool directly in front of the cash register.) We reintroduce ourselves, and make small talk covering what we learned about eachother when we met. She tells me where she was staying ( the house of a cougar I know on the hill ) and I cannot remember exactly what she said, but it was along the lines of "we should hangout", or "lets do something sometime". So ask for her number, and get it Dance She leaves with her to-go coffee.
I noticed that she came all the way into my intimate zone, her face was about 8-10 inches from mine when she was adding her cream and sugar. I could still get a whiff of Ascend every once and a while, so I know she was in my ascend cloud.
IDK if I'm going to call her. Phone game is my weak point. . . Apparently I have a sexy phone voice (lol the girls tell me straight out) but my gamesmanship just goes out the window. Gah
Copied from my journal
Hehe I've noticed that Ascend makes me horny after a few hours. Like 3-5 hours after application I turn into a Pussy Hound.
![[Image: 34t60p1.gif]](http://i41.tinypic.com/34t60p1.gif)
AM, Certo, Glace, Corporativo, L2K V1 & V2, Aquagen, AV, Wolf, Nude, Hypnotica, OD Gel, Erox, N.P.A., EoaW, TL, TA, TI, TrueTrust, XXX, TrueEssence, Wingman 7, 9, 9+O, Black, Blue, X, Extreme, X22, C4 and M512, Ascend, Evolve, Cohesion, Bliss, Vibe, Prowl, ienone, anone, Androsterone, Pregnenolone, Androstadienol, Androstenetrione
(This post was last modified: 06-05-2012 9:36 AM by eyeofra.)
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