Post: #21

Threads like these make me thankful that Pherotruth exists

Post: #22

Don't feel bad, Randy Dude! There's NOTHING wrong with LEARNING.

On the positive side, at least you got to lose a LOAD. But for goodness sakes, don't sit around the house waiting and hoping for her return. A lot of men do that, I did, too; and lied to myself that I was moving on when all I was doing was WAITING for her return.

And remember: Some things just keep repeating themselves until we FINALLY learn our lesson.

LIVE and LEARN!

Post: #23

(04-02-2017 11:51 AM)MMM Wrote:  LIVE and LEARN!

or better yet .... learn to live!

Post: #24

Next time she asks to be with you, tell her oh sounds good but I have a date tonight, maybe next time.

Post: #25

(04-02-2017 2:53 PM)purpleblood Wrote:  Next time she asks to be with you, tell her oh sounds good but I have a date tonight, maybe next time.

I also highly recommend this. Along with posting said date on snapchat for her to see

Post: #26

Start rating her neuroses:

+10 points for effective use of sexy photos
+20 points for going commando
+50 for the shave
-20 points for crankiness
-50 points for tantrum
-10 points for snark


Make it up as you go along. Also, if she bails for any reason, you must not show a reaction. "Cool" or "OK" are about as much as you can respond. When she bails, ensure that you go out and have a good time. YOU are the prize, and ensure she knows it.

Post: #27

+1,000,000 Points

Post: #28

I told her to fuck off. You guys can stop posting now. Thanks for the advice and support. I am so sick of women's bullshit.

Post: #29

Randy,
I didn't my 2 cents in. Not about what you should do, but about what is going on... Psychologically.

It sounds like you have a situation that falls into what can be defined as Avoidant Attachment..

Attachment in psychology defines a classification of how individuals react in relationships. This is helpful for the next relationship as well.

Someone with Avoidant Attachment will want a relationship that isn't too close. As soon as it gets too close or too intimate or too committed they will spike in anxiety and feel that they are not independent, then they will run away or start a fight to break up or withdraw and go off the radar. It is due to abuse/neglect from their mom between the ages of 0-3 years. Of all the psychology that is crap, this attachment stuff is not crap, it is real.

From your description, you are the Anxious attachment style. That is why you put up with her crap.

here are some links:

Quote:https://pherotruth.com/Thread-Attachment...ant-Secure

Quote:jeb kinneson ( i like his book)

Quote:
10. Stresses boundaries
9. Uncomfortable sharing deep feelings
8. Prefers casual sex
7. Disregards your feelings
6. Misses you when apart, but when together wants to escape
5. Pulls away when intimacy nears
4. Idealizes a past relationship or partner, or dreams of “the one”
3. Sends mixed signals
2. Values independence and looks down on “neediness”
1. Fear of commitment/Fear of being “trapped”

Quote:
Avoidant Attachment Style Indicators
-an individual may describe themselves as *
-INDEPENDANT
-NEEDS THEIR SPACE
-They end their relationships more frequently.
-They cheat more than other styles.
-Avoidants who divorce are more likely to divorce again.
-They suppress loving emotions, so they “get over” partners very quickly and start dating again immediately.
-Avoidants don’t date one another, because they lack the “glue” that keeps people together. As a result, more of them are single at any given time.
-Sends mixed messages, e.g. push-pull.
-Disregards your emotional well-being.
-Suggests that you are too needy, too sensitive or overreacting.
-Ignores things you say that inconvenience him – doesn’t respond or changes topic.
-Addresses your concerns in a “court of law” – responds to the facts without taking feelings into account.
-Defensive argument style, threatened by criticism.
-Sets boundaries, keeps his distance.
-Separates sex from emotional intimacy.
-Uses Miranda Rights in dating: Warns you up front that he is a “bad boyfriend,” not ready for commitment, etc. to absolve himself of emotional responsibility. But doesn’t walk away; “If you get hurt, it’s your own fault.”

Post: #30

(04-05-2017 2:22 PM)dexter Wrote:  Randy,
I didn't my 2 cents in. Not about what you should do, but about what is going on... Psychologically.

It sounds like you have a situation that falls into what can be defined as Avoidant Attachment..

Attachment in psychology defines a classification of how individuals react in relationships. This is helpful for the next relationship as well.

Someone with Avoidant Attachment will want a relationship that isn't too close. As soon as it gets too close or too intimate or too committed they will spike in anxiety and feel that they are not independent, then they will run away or start a fight to break up or withdraw and go off the radar. It is due to abuse/neglect from their mom between the ages of 0-3 years. Of all the psychology that is crap, this attachment stuff is not crap, it is real.

From your description, you are the Anxious attachment style. That is why you put up with her crap.

here are some links:

Quote:jeb kinneson ( i like his book)

Quote:
10. Stresses boundaries
9. Uncomfortable sharing deep feelings
8. Prefers casual sex
7. Disregards your feelings
6. Misses you when apart, but when together wants to escape
5. Pulls away when intimacy nears
4. Idealizes a past relationship or partner, or dreams of “the one”
3. Sends mixed signals
2. Values independence and looks down on “neediness”
1. Fear of commitment/Fear of being “trapped”

I did it and it said I was preoccupied. I think this is true. I'm pretty normal in a relationship, but always come up with a lot of doubt for the other person(they are lying, concealing). These feelings gradually go away the longer the relationship lasts.