READ THIS: Newbie Survival Guide: Etiquette and Customs
07-25-2019 11:16 AM
Hiya!
Welcome to the truth….Pherotruth.
If you’re new, as in just signed up, lurked in the lurches for a while and thought you’d jump in, or otherwise getting your proverbial virtual feet wet, this is for you.
I know, I know…we all know because we’ve all been there. You are enthusiastic, maybe even excited about these mystical potions called pheromones and you have one million and six questions, or you already have tons of experience that you are chomping at the bit to share. Before you ask that first question, though, let’s talk just a modicum about the culture here at Pherotruth.
As of the time of this writing we have roughly one-quarter of a million threads, over 5500 active members, enough prior members to fully populate a 2nd world country, and a solid core group of regular veterans. Most of us are pretty cool, helpful, and vastly knowledgeable in all things pheromones. While other forums will make the claim, Pherotruh is, in truth, a live community. You’ll find some awesome people here, as well as one or two that rub you the wrong way.
We also have our own way of doing things: a culture has arisen here, and this lengthy rant is to help you navigate the what’s, how’s, and why’s in your first days here as you grow into a positive and contributing member. Some might say that the vets are kind of harsh on the newbies. While this might be so if painted in a certain light; the fact of the matter is that far too many new members, in their enthusiasm to jump right in, disrupt the flow and organization of the board. Eventually the forum becomes so cluttered that meaningful research and enlightenment become inhibited due to all the flotsam mucking up the site . By following the customs that have developed here you’ll save yourself some minor turmoil and in the months and years to come, you’ll appreciate having a tidy site to peruse.
With that in mind, here are some of the golden rules:
Search and Research before you ask: With a quarter-million threads here, almost any question you can think of has been asked. So when you, in your well-meaning enthusiasm ask one of the most common questions, there’s a 99.9999999934% chance that you are the third person this week alone to ask the same, or a related question.
With that in mind, use the search function. Now, granted, with all those threads, all those comments, and all those other members shooting off their mouths (especially me!), that is a lot of ground to cover. The search function can be daunting. Use the advanced search features instead. When I am first searching for something I use the advanced search function.
Using the advanced features on the search cuts out a lot of the inapplicable junk that doesn’t pertain to your topic. In the search box type as many keywords as you can muster. Search (first) in titles only. Thread titles are the topic of the thread, so if it comes up in your search by title, then you know it is related. You can even limit your search to particular members, certain main forum categories and sub-categories, etc.
Do this a few times, and actually read the threads that are related to your question, topic, or general knowledge search. Not only will you be able to learn lots and lots of things this way, you won’t come off as an idiot. Just walking in and asking “What should I use for…..” when there are already more than 3,000 entries on what pheromone blends work well in situation X and Y without checking first is kind of like walking into a library and asking where you can find a book about philosophy. A legion of Conan the Librarians will say “Don’t you know the Dewey Decimal system?” (that’s a Weird Al Yankovic UHF reference if you didn’t get it)
So search, search well, search hard, and search fully before you ask. If your question is not addressed in any of the 250,000 posts on here then ask. And that brings us to our next customary procedure.
Do not start a new thread when a related one already exists. We know, we know. You’re all excited about your success with pheromones, after having used Product X out in the field, or you’ve tried out your first amazing combination and the others need to know about it, you know, for science. But do not just pop on and make a thread about Product X. If the product exists, there’s a good chance that there’s already a thread out there for opinions, experiences, and reviews.
Always add to existing threads instead of creating a new thread. Think this over. If you want to know all about Product X, is it easier to go a single place on Pherotruth and read through all the thoughts, opinions, and experiences everyone has with Product X, or is it easier to sort through 6,000 separate threads by 6,000 separate members?
As a general rule, for the sake of order, and to save you the pain of not doing so: Add to existing threads.
Only start a new thread if no related thread exists. Use the search feature to find out.
Combination threads for products also exist. While there is a lot of overlap there, the “don’t start a new thread” rule applies. If there is a thread about Product X combos, then post your combination there.
If you do start a new thread put it in the right place. That’s right, there’s actually organization here. Discussions about particular products go in the Pheromone companies, reviews and links section, under the proper company name. It is bad form, and confusing to post a review of, or question about, Product X in the Men’s section…it is better suited to be in the proper category. The generic men’s / ladies’ sections are for non-product-specific discussion. While specific products, on topic of course, are openly discussed there, those are tertiary to the topics at hand, not the topic at hand.
If you are discussing, reviewing, or asking about particular products, put those posts in the proper product places. General theory, philosophy, and generic topics go in their own places.
Post your question or point only once and do not hijack threads. If you have a question or point, post it once. You do not need to post your question twelve times in twelve threads. Don’t worry, everyone will get to it. I know how it feels when you want to know something and you ask. It seems like forever until you get an answer.
Double and treble posting just creates clutter and it won’t be long until even you cannot tell if your point has been addressed because you need to look at umpteen posts to see who answered, in what way, and when.
Likewise, when you are adding to a thread, stay on topic. Just because the thread is discussing a certain product and somebody mentions that “while it does give a bit of VIP status it isn’t as much of an alpha vibe as BW” does not mean that you should jump in and ask what product to use for the best alpha boost. There are already several threads to discuss that; don’t hijack an unrelated thread. Sure, thread drift is organic and natural and lengthy threads will often have lots of sub-topics, banter, joking around, maybe even some pee-pee measuring going on, but they all still stay on target, or return to it. You wouldn’t want somebody to hijack your thread to discuss the latest Superhero movie, so don’t do that to others.
Follow the Golden rule: This one applies to everyone, not just newbies! Treat everyone else how you want to be treated. Don’t pop on here and start throwing out accusations, insults, anger, and negativity. You can disagree with, and debate, anyone, but always do so with deference to them, their dignity, and with a sense of respect. If you are an abrasive accusatory jerk, shoot off your mouth, start bad mouthing others, or otherwise are acting like a little child throwing a tantrum, you will be treated in kind. Treat others as you wish to be treated. Now sure, we’re not all happy-happy joy-joy around here, and some of us butt heads every now and then. But even the most caustic ones here still give others at least the bare minimum of respect. Some feuds do erupt, but that is the exception, not the rule.
This is not a Grammar contest: We are a world-wide community. Not everyone here is from America or even speaks English as their primary language. Furthermore, we all have differing mastery over the English language. We are here to help each other and to learn, not to grade our essays.
Record as much detail as you care to. We are not here to brag or to one-up each other. It doesn’t matter if I use Product X and get a few smiles and you use it and you make porn movies look tame. We need to compile as much user experience as we possibly can in as much accurate detail as you care to muster. We are not here solely for ourselves, we are here for everyone, including those that come after us. Record your facts, your conjecture, your impressions, etc. While we are not all scientists, we are attempting to compile data in a pseudo-scientific manner. Don’t exaggerate, but you can be as dry, humored, or entertaining as you feel. But we need real data, as much of it as we can possibly acquire.
Debate and disagree with respect. We will always have differences of opinion, disagreements, and debates. In the proper context this is healthy and informative. Healthy debate is necessary for growth. When you disagree, do so with respect to the other side, the person with the opposing point of view, and accept that their point of view is no less valid than yours; at the very least from their subjective standpoint. Do not attack the person (ad hominin), their character, or use any of the debate tactics in order to “win”. Debate and disagreement is about sharing points of view and finding common ground, not about devastating one’s opponent. This is, again, the golden rule. Respect the person and all will be well.
Before you bad mouth a product or vendor, make sure it isn’t you. This shouldn’t need to be said, but it does. If you try a product and it doesn’t work for you, it doesn’t mean that everyone else is blowing smoke up your hinnie; it might just be you.
A particular pheromone product won’t necessarily work for everyone, and it most definitely doesn’t work for anyone in exactly the same way. Lots of products need to be “driven”, which means that one must act and present themselves in a certain fashion. If you don’t do that correctly it will be less effective or totally ineffective. If 10,20, or 1000 people are saying that they like a blend and you try it and nothing happens, it is probably you, or how you’re acting in the moment.
There are hundreds of internal and external variables at play in every social interaction. Don’t assume that long-term or respected members are full of the poo because you tried it once or twice or even more and it didn’t work for you. Likewise, if your favorite blend no longer seems to be hitting for you, check yourself before you go on a “this is snake-oil” rant.
By the same token, and trust me we all know this, don’t start ranting about how crappy a particular company is just because you had a single bad experience. Things happen. We all know that those that whine the loudest tend to be trouble makers. While we need to know if they stole you money, won’t answer emails, refused to provide reasonable customer service etc.; if you’re venting because you had a bad experience, we’ll all know.
Whenever there is a problem in a business transaction there are always two sides of the story. The complainers always paint themselves as timid and understanding angels, but this is seldom the true case. If you do have a bad experience, reach out to the company first. Be respectful and polite. If they won’t work with you at all, and you know in your heart and soul that you were nothing but understanding, polite, and respectful then tell us all about it, but please do so without disparaging the company, its employees, etc.
If a company has shady business practices or a terrible attitude, it will quickly be known and the word will spread and their business will suffer and die . That should be your satisfaction, not venting in a flaming tantrum.
Contribute. Duh! If you want to be accepted here, follow the general flow of the community. Get a product or two or three and learn them, use them, report your findings. Once you get to know some products, then branch out and learn and discover more. Add to the community’s volume of knowledge and experience and you will have a load of informative fun here. If you just post and pop out, others will tend to ignore you, because as much as we all want to help each other out, it is a give and take thing, not just a take thing.
My newbie brothers, learn this, live it, love it and you shall be welcomed here with open arms.
Isn't Life Actually the Kobayashi Maru? Click to Read My Journal: Gladen's Grimoire
(This post was last modified: 07-25-2019 11:55 AM by Gladen.)
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READ THIS: Newbie Survival Guide: Etiquette and Customs
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